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Would this man respond to "Bruce"?
Pay careful attention to the hairless filtrum and parabolic eyebrows. Take account of the height to ear ratio. Evaluate the interesting rod-like deformities protruding from the neck. Is this man a Bruce?
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Yes, of course. I was his cell mate! |
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No, no, no. This man is no more a Bruce than Winston is (and everyone knows Winston isn't). |
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Bruce! Bruce!? Bruce.
Evidently this is Bruce but it really is just worth stopping and thinking for a second. This man is rich. This man is famous. This man is respected. And
This man's name is Bruce.
"Bruce", his mother used to call. "Bruce, your Reddy Brek is getting cold." And he would come a runnin'. Just think about it.. He is called Bruce for George's sake!.
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Yes, umm, this is Bruce. I know. Fool. |
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No I like to press things which blatantly are wrong just to see what will happen when I do. That's how I got here dammit.. |
But Ma, I told you! I don't like Reddy Brek! |
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Yes, it is a shrew. I mean rabbit.
But in any case the question is not one of species but of nameologicality. Was this rabbitshrew christened "Bruce"? Is it even male - perhaps, I hear you cry, perhaps it's a Julie or a Stephanie or even a Gertrude? How shall I ever tell?! Thusly you shall contemplate this conundrum as you gently sob into your curry-stained vestments you filthy, filthy little dizzard. |
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Yes, Bruce he/she/it be. I know my rabbitshrews. I got a C in rabbitshrewology don't you know. |
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No, that was my rabbit and Hilda certainly wasn't called Bruce! How else do you think I made this curry? |
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Surely, he must be?
Urine stained hat that used to be his grandpappy's, an empty can of what looks like Foster's in his right hand and a complete lack of eyes. The evidence is mounting.
He's calling you can't you see? "Come with me. Come with me for I am Bruce. Or am I? Muhahahahah. Bah."
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Yessir, this 'ere is bruceosity at its finest. |
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Hmm, tempting but no. This isn't Bruce. Everyone knows Bruces are allergic to (off) yellow. |
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The dude, not the "thing".
It was a real swine delivering the llama. That Casio was beyond reach for a little while - put it that way.
But is it Bruce the Llama farmer or some kind of anti-Bruce - a non-Bruce if you will? This is the question that remains burning inside you just like that car with the couple in that you torched last week. Yes, we know who you are.
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Well, duh! He has a llama, of course he's Bruce. Fool. |
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No, it's a cunning llama-related ploy. He's an actor employed by the tourist board of the state of Alabama. |
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Bruce is short for?
Bruceforth
Captain Brucey Bruce
Bruceogonal
Brucerey
Bracelet
Steve |
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Of 100 real females surveyed by YFTW how many were willing to change their name to Bruce for us nice people?
None. They were all called Bruce already.
7
14 and a half
28
We forgot to remember to count |
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Where can we find a maggot farmer called Bruce?
We're just generally interested really - nothing to do with the quiz.
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(Your Bruce score will not be shared with any third parties.) |
